Literary Cows

And it wasn't long before we went literary on your arse:

SHAKESPEAREISM
You have two cows and two bulls. For spurious reasons the cows dress as bulls and the bulls dress as cows. Much hilarity ensues.

BRONTEISM:
You have three cows. They live on the moors in Yorkshire and die tragically young.

JANE AUSTENISM:
You have a cow and a bull. They are obviously made for each other, but don't find out until Chapter 18.

LAKE WOBEGONISM
You have two cows. They are strong and above average, and will one day become the key to a meandering little adventure.

TOLKIENISM
You have two cows of power, you must take one to Mount Doom in Mordor and throw it into the fiery depths. The other one is a wizard.

TOLKIENISM ACCORDING TO CS LEWIS
Not another fucking cow.

JK ROWLINGISM
You have two cows. They have made you unimaginably wealthy.

E E CUMMINGS
you have
two
cows

JACK KEROUAC
You have two cows. They travel the length and breadth of the land to find themselves.

GEORGE ORWELL
Four cows good. Two cows bad.

BRIDGET JONES
Cows owned: 2

CHARLES DICKENS
You have two cows. You give them implausible names which are meant to be funny.

ENID BLYTON
You have 5 cows, though confusingly one of them is a dog. Together they have some smashing adventures, washed down with lashings of ginger beer.

THOMAS HARDY
You have two cows. They live hard lives on bleak moorland and die tragic deaths, but only after elongating the story for far longer than is really necessary.

WORDSWORTH
I wandered lonely as a cow.

There are surely endless possibilities to the literary cows, including these on wiki. Please post new ones in the comments section!